Good thing you're clean, Beyonce. Hepatitis sucked. But at least you would've known where you got it from.
A year later, I remember it too vividly. I've never felt as sick.
Lost a lot of weight, though.
Britney Shears
Let's all do our society a favor and stop caring. I'm not talking about dismissing the things that truly matter: there are plenty of serious issues out there worthy of our attention[ I won't list any of them her because, "If you have it, you don't need it. If you need it, you don't have it."].
But if we all could agree to show unanimous disinterest about celebrity gossip, the world would be a much better place. Why I was engaged in a conversation tonight with a bunch of educated adults concerning Britney Spears' freshly shorn cranium is beyond me. It's the byproduct of a lazy, sensationalizing media, and my naive viewership.
I've never met these celebrities, but I know more about them than I do my own friends. And it's not like I go out of my way to learn this information. It's presented to me in easy-to-digest chunks whenever I'm watching TV or on the I\internet.
I blame the media because even reputable news sources [Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Entertainment Tonight, etc,] are now reporting this crap. But if there wasn't demand from the paying public, they wouldn't keep throwing it in our faces. So we have to make the first move, unite as one, and ignore this journalistic cotton candy.
So let's forget about Paris Hilton's latest after-school special. Don't worry about who's Anna Nicole Smith's baby's daddy. And unless it's Buzz Aldrin giving me Pampers for Kaelyn, I vow to know nothing about astronauts and diapers.
This world could be a better place if we only try.
Did I mention that I'm still ticked that Jessica Simpson screwed over Nick Lachey?
Exit Stage Left
This is the most American Idol we've watched since season 1. This is still my favorite part of the entire show: the bad auditions are unbeatable. It seems like even Paula is a little less sympathetic to the bad singers. One thing that's bothered me this year is the doors of the audition room. Some producer thought it would be humorous to leave one of the exit doors locked, offering up some embarrassing moments for people who just completely embarrassed themselves. There's no other reason to have the door locked; it's a quick exit push bar. I've been telling Kelly about it for weeks and, sure enough, tonight was their "locked door montage."
Of course, why am I expecting American Idol to be sophisticated? The snow is making me crazy.
Carr out.
The Power Of Colbert
Watching the Colbert Report tonight, Stephen once again enticed his viewer to attack Wikipedia. In his "Word" segment, he offered up a rant on Microsoft paying people to change Wikipedia entries. Colbert enticed his nation to change the entry on elephants, tonight he offered $5 to the first person who changed the "Reality" entry to state, "reality becomes a commodity."
I had my laptop open so, no sooner had he said it, I had the page up and it was changed. Then I refreshed the page and someone had already protected it.
At least I got the screenshot to prove it worked.
Observe the power of Colbert: once he says it, things happen.
Brilliant.
Children Of Men
Last week I took the opportunity to catch a movie in the theaters. This itself is an event considering I saw only one film all of last year [albeit just a month ago]. Additionally, I went by myself. I never go to movies alone. The first, and only other, movie I went to alone was a bio of Martin Luther. I think I'm liking the solo experience. If I had been a little braver in my younger days, I might have tried this more. Anyway, the film I chose to see was Children Of Men, adapted from a novel by PD James. It was released somewhat silently at the end of last year in limited venues and hit broad audiences just last week. I had read a couple of reviews that sold me on it.
It's an interesting premise. Thirty years from now there's an infertility epidemic; the youngest person in the world is eighteen years of age. A world without children has gone crazy, and only Great Britain has escaped total anarchy [no, it's not a comedy]. England, however, is inundated with refugees, many illegal aliens, who are the target of mass persecution. When a young refugee girl is discovered to be with child, action is taken to remove her from the country to insure the child's safety. What ensues is a futuristic nativity story where the birth of the child is the greatest event of a generation.
The movie was powerful, masterfully filmed and brilliantly conceived. It's heavy on language and violence, so definitely not for the faint of heart. If you can't get out to see it, file it mentally for a DVD rental. It's worth it.
On The Clock
So now that we have the DVR I decided to get back into 24. We watched the entire first season [before it was "cool" to watch] as I loved the concept. But we stepped away in season 2. Kel's not a huge fan of all the gore, so it wasn't worth it. Now she doesn't have to watch it if she doesn't want to and I can fast-forward through those scenes. My opinion so far: it is what it is. There's so much hype surrounding the show but let's call it what it is: a soap opera with testosterone. I still think the acting is over the top [what's up with Chloe?] and that the sequences are pretty predictable.
Still, I'm going to give it another chance.
Jack Bauer is pretty cool.
postscript: Then again, after watching the entire episode, I never watched a soap opera where the nuked LA.
Grammar: The Really Mean Girl
Fortunately she's an actress and not a writer. Lindsey Lohan's effort to extend condolences to Robert Altman's family was a massacre of the English language. Highlights include:
"He left us with a legend that all of us have the ability to do."
"Please just take each moment day by day and consider yourself lucky to breathe and feel at all and smile"
"Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of yourselves' (12st book) -everytime there's a triumph in the world a million souls hafta be trampled on.-altman Its true."
Read the gruesome details here.
Gone Country
I don't watch the Country Music Awards but I might have to start if Faith Hill is going to lose it every time she loses an award. After losing Female Vocalist of the Year to Carrie Underwood, Hill showed her disappointment by yelling "What?!?!" into the camera and walking away.
Apparently Hill left some of her solid country fans disillusioned when she went mainstream. She's been trying to make a comeback in country circles, knowing that it's where the consistent money is at, and she loses a major award to an American Idol. Only a blaring extended middle finger could've been more succinct.
Of course, the spin has begun. Faith said it was all a joke and that she'd never disrespect another artist that way. Here's a link to a close up of her reaction. You tell me if she was just kidding.
I, for one, don't buy it.
The Amazing Oaf
We're watching the DVR'd episode of this week's Amazing Race. I need a witness about the guy who's the partner with the girl with one leg [did that make sense?]. Anyway, he's gotta be the biggest A-hole on reality television since Omarosa. Anyone? Anyone?
Update: there is justice in this world- the dude was kicked off tonight. Too bad for his partner; as much as he was a turd, she was awesome.